God’s sovereignty reigns over all the people of the Earth. God executes his divine will from this holy throne—Psalm 47:8 (King Jimmy Translation).
Sovereign Humor
Does God have a sense of humor? I believe so.
You’ve seen some of His unique creations, haven’t you? A giraffe has a long neck for reaching high vegetation in trees, but a sore throat is an Achilles heel for them. How did the first man describe a platypus it to his buddies? “Guys, you won’t believe this. This weird creature has a duck-like bill, the body of an otter, but lays eggs like an iguana, has poisoned barbs on its webbed-feet, and plasters “TRUMP 2016” bumper stickers on the butts of unsuspecting animals.” (I made up that last part.) The platypus destroys the old saying, “if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck . . .” God surely chuckled at the religious crowd when the platypus did not fit their agenda. He confused their vain attempts to confine the Creator in the “God-only-works-this-way” box.
One of my favorite Bible stories is found in First Samuel, chapters 4-6. These chapters recall the story when the ISIS wannabes, the wicked Philistines, captured Israel’s most sacred treasure—the Ark of the Covenant. The Philistines praised their god Dagon while they carried the Ark to the city of Ashdod, celebrating the capture of the God of Israel. Now, he served them.
In Heaven, the archangel Gabriel and the warrior angels grabbed handfuls of fire and brimstone.
“Turn us loose, Lord God.” Gabriel said. “We’ll show them who’s Boss!”
God, with a twinkle in his eye, grinned. “Hold on, fellas. I’ve got a surprise for them.”
The Philistines partied after putting the Ark in Dagon’s temple. The next morning, they found Dagon prostrate before the Ark of the Covenant. With great effort, the Philistine priests raised the massive stone statue aright before this embarrassing incident went public. During the night, Dagon fell forward and broke into pieces before the Ark. Some theologians believe the Humpty-Dumpty legend originated here.
Still grinning ear-to-ear, God and the angels leaned over a cloud. “That’s nothing,” God said. “Watch this, boys.”
The Bible says that millions of rats suddenly appeared. The Philistines watched helplessly as rats ate all the crops surrounding Ashdod. Only hard dirt and rocks remained.
“I’m not finished, yet boys,” God said to the angels. He couldn’t help but chuckle.
Just like he did in creation, God spoke again. “Let there be tumors.”
The word “tumor,” translated into modern language, means “hemorrhoids.” (Yes, you read that correctly.) Talk about piling it on—God blessed every unholy Ashdod hiney with hemorrhoids.
“Oh, Lord,” Gabriel said. “That’s so good!”
After several weeks, the sorely afflicted, itchy people of Ashdod had enough of this Ark-thingamajig, so they shipped it to Gath, a neighboring town. History repeated itself. Rats destroyed the crops and drugstores ran out of ointment. The people moved the Ark to another city. Same results—no food, awkward walking and squirmy sitting in the pews of the now-defunct Dagon temple. They had yet to learn their lesson
In every Philistine city where the Ark landed, rats ruined the crops, the local ointment black market flourished, and senior pagans quit playing musical chairs at the Dagon temple pot-luck dinner socials.
After seven months of insane itching, the Philistines wised-up and sent the Ark back to Israel, but they dared not send it back empty-handed. Their skilled craftsmen made golden rats and golden tumors as an “I’m-so-sorry” guilt offering to Israel (1 Samuel 6:4).
I can picture in my mind golden rats, but golden tumors? Really?
The Ark and golden goodies were placed on a new ox cart and sent on its way unaccompanied. The Philistines wanted nothing more to do with the Ark—ever. The Bible says they glorified the God of Heaven as the Ark disappeared over the horizon.
Our Father God definitely has a sense of humor. When Jesus walked the earth, I’m sure he and his disciples laughed and joked. Jewish humor is some of the funniest in the world. Humor certainly would come into play later in the disciple’s lives as hardships and persecutions followed them, just as Jesus promised, wherever they preached the good news of the kingdom of God (John 16:33).
God is sovereign. Mans’ attempts to limit God in a box and then state emphatically he can act only in certain ways, makes God laugh. Who are we to tell God how to act or how to perform his will? God is the ultimate authority. He does as he pleases. Who but God would have thought of a national hemorrhoid plague? I wouldn’t.
God’s sovereignty uses whatever techniques he chooses to bless us, correct us or draw men to him, whether using his word, or through the handiwork of his creation, or however he chooses. He has placed his moral laws of right and wrong upon the hearts of all men, even if they’ve never heard the name of Jesus. God reveals his sovereignty to us, but he lets us choose whether to follow him or go our own way.
Lord, may we always revere your holy sovereignty. Use whatever means you choose to perform your will here on Earth as it is in Heaven. May your kingdom have dominion over all the Earth.
Stay close to Jesus
Jimmy
Philistine doctors worked feverously to find relief from God’s punishment, but in frustration, they quit at Preparation G.
Jimmy Eskew © 2016
THANKFUL 
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